HEALING

I don't know how to express my excitement. I feel like words cannot express and exclamation points cannot express. So I will just say what I need to say.
God gave me an unmistakable peace today that He is healing. That He has healed. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now before everyone starts to think that life will be perfect now, let me explain. :) God has healed me of needing medication. After I get through this withdrawal period and the Paxil is out of my system, I will not be going on any additional medication. !!!!!!!!!!!!! He has made it clear to me that from here on out I will be able to handle whatever struggles there are with HIS strength and with Christian counsel. I believe He has healed me of the worst. I believe He has healed me of hallucinations. I believe He has healed me of my mind becoming so muddled and unable to make sense of situations. I believe He has healed me of being so overwhelmed that I cannot think.
I do not believe that there won't be hard times or that the postpartum depression will be completely gone - if He chooses to heal in that manner than GREAT. :) However, I believe that He has healed me of the worst of the physical aspect of the depression and now I will be able to rely on Him and Christian therapy. For now I will be staying on the Trazadone. It would be too much for my system to go off of both medications. I do not feel as if God is wanting me to discontinue that medication at present. Now He may expect that of me in the future and I will be willing when He makes it clear that I am ready. But that is not right now. Like I said, I will continue therapy - but only Christian therapy. I plan on continuing this for at least the duration of residency - I think that will be healthiest for me and for our marriage/family. I do not plan on staying on the Trazadone that long but I will follow God's leading where this is concerned.
I also know that I have to stay open and willing to whatever path the Lord leads me down. If in the future for some reason that path leads me to needing medication again, I will do what I have to do. However, I know that for now that is no longer the case. Yipee! :) I am very excited to be away from some of the side effects I have had from the Paxil.
I have to say thank you to all of you for praying. I know that the recent banding together of believers praying for my healing has played a HUGE part in all of this. God has heard and answered!! I found this verse today and it is perfect:
"Indeed, in our hearts, we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and He will deliver us. On Him we have set our hope that He will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many." 2 Cor 1:9-11
Thank you again for prayers! Please rejoice in the Lord tonight!
I still covet your prayers as I go through the next couple of weeks but please forgo that tonight and just praise!!